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Funny Common Mistakes on CV's

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Funny Common Mistakes on CV's

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Some Funny CV Faux Pas



Here are some silly, if not pretty funny common mistakes that have been made on CV's. Do not forget to make sure you do not make any of the following errors ....
 


Grammatical errors, spelling mistakes and typos


Mr/Mrs/Ms - missing off the 's' if you are a married woman and adding the 's' by accident if you are a man!

Forgetting your contact details - how will they get hold of you?

Forgetting your address - how will they know where you are from?

"I have had sex jobs in the last year" rather than "I have had six job in the last year".


 

Layout, design and content mistakes


A CV that it totally capitals or little letters throughout.

A CV typed in very bright red (or whatever your favourite colour is), bold font throughout - practically unreadable and very over-bearing!

A photo of yourself !!!

A photo of your whole family and children!!

 

Lies


Straight A's in GCSE and A levels when they have been working in a fast food outlet since leaving school.

Working as PA to the Prime Minister!

 

Ridiculous things to mention / Irrelevant Info

"I am talk, dark and very good looking so when you meet me you will definitely employ me"

"God fearing"

"Please do not think that I have jumped from job to job from the 15 jobs listed. I just get itchy feet and need change."

Personal interests (man) - "painting my toenails in varying colours"

"Personal profile:
height - 5ft 2",
weight - 10 stone,
religion - catholic,
colour hair - black,
colour eyes - blue"

"Qualifications: No education or experience."

"Marital Status: Unmarried Bachelor"

"Interests: I enjoy driving around in my Lamborghini at the weekends"

 

Contradictions


"I have a known track record and excellent experience with accurancy and fixing erors"
 

Mentioning WHY you have left your current job


"I had an affair with my boss which went wrong, so I had to leave my current job!"

"I was fired because I told my boss I fancied him "

"I have failed the last 4 accountancy exams that I have taken and so have decided to look for a job in a different field"

"I have been working as an Accountant for 5 years but I am very bored of it and in need of a change!"

"I have worked for my Mum for 3 years, but it is now time for a change!"

"I have been out of work due to having my leg amputated, however, I am now recovered and looking for employment again."

 

Miscellaneous


A complaint to the Mayor of London about the congestion charge, instead of someone actually sending their CV - they attached the wrong document - lack of attention to detail!

The use of email addresses e.g. airyfairy@hotmail.com, dumbblonde@hotmail.com, psycholady@hotmail.com - not likely to impress an employer!
 
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Funny Common Mistakes on CV's

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